Blog-huh?

My bestfriend got engage last January 12, which was their 11th or 12th Anniversary. I kinda lost count when they have been dating for a decade. LOL

I didn't expect that she will ask me to be her Maid of Honor since, I remember the last conversation we had about Wedding Entourage, she said that she won't be asking a close friend to be her Maid of Honor cause it can create conflicts with friends.

I was shocked and happy that she ask me. Since lately we haven't been speaking to each other due to a certain reason. I don't mean to "rain of her parade", this is why I'm putting this into writing.

Yes I am Happy for her, cause the plan she set for her life is on track. They have been together for more than a decade, its enough reasonable reason for her confidence that this is the guy that she is destined to be with. They have been through a lot of trials and who know's what more. What's more important, is that He makes her Happy and He knows Emma more than anyone else. They are both stable and I think being together for a decade and at the age of 28, its time for Emma to settle down and live her dream.

I'm telling this all cause it helps to convince myself that the guy she is marrying is special to her and that he deserves her love and devotion. I keep on blabbing about the two of them, when my ranting isn't exactly about it.

You see, when Emma ask me to be her Made of Honor, I felt that I won't get married. Let me rephrase that, I think That I WIll Never Get Married. I don't know what triggers this feeling. I was crying last night while I put on a mask congratulating her and telling her how psyche I was to be her maid of honor. I know its was a hypocritical thing for me doing that, and its not my type who acts fake. Except my double standard principle over pirated DVD products.

I just wish my hunch will prove me wrong someday. I don't want to be an "Old dog lady"!